Stating that couples break up more easily during the summer season is not a cliché, but a fact now supported by authoritative scientific studies. There may be many reasons for this, but underlying it is a substantial one: even a few days of close living can bring latent problems and conflicts out into the open.
In fact, if during the year work and the commitments of daily life keep the various misunderstandings in abeyance, everything changes drastically when you are alone for so many hours, under a beach umbrella or on a mountaintop. Sometimes quarrels begin as early as the decision of the destination of the trip to be taken together. And the reasons for disagreement then continue for a whole series of seemingly very trivial pretexts: clothing, the friends with whom one wants to share some or all of one’s days off, the preferences and habits chosen daily for one’s summer leisure.
For example, 65 percent of women like to be in the sun at least 5 hours a day, while men endure much less (43 percent less than 3 hours). And if he is bored sunbathing (53 percent), only 4 percent of women consider the beach a waste of time. For her, sunbathing is above all, complicit with sunbathing, a real beauty cure (58 percent), as well as a way to relax (38 percent). But there‘s more: it turns out that only 12 percent of women like to go to the beach with their partner, while 20 percent of men say they are inclined to bask in the sun next to their woman. It follows that this all affects what the couple considers to be the overall perception of the vacation, during which the main need for both of them is to disconnect from the hectic pace of everyday life, but which is impossible if one cannot understand the other’s point of view.
For some years now, then, misunderstandings have also come from excessive technology, and the constant browsing of chat rooms and social media. In the summer, the couple should force themselves to disconnect as much as possible, and instead connect with the person with whom they have chosen to share their lives. And vacations can be the optimal means of finding, or rediscovering, communication unmediated by new technologies. In summary, these are the experts’ suggestions:
Listen to yourself
Take advantage of the vacations to ask ourselves and our partner, “What can we do to improve the couple’s understanding? What desires can be realized together?” Therefore, doing without smartphones can also be helpful in figuring out where one stands in the project of life for two.
Rekindling desire
According to a U.S. study, it appears that 16 percent of men suffer from a total lack of sexual stimulation toward their partners due to too much time spent posting and tweeting. Nothing beats reclaiming your intimacy starting with the holidays–avoiding bringing technological tools to bed.
Rediscovering the pleasure of convivial moments
It may benefit the couple to rediscover dining out in a cozy, romantic setting. The cell phone must strictly remain off, focusing only on the partner.
And if all that is not enough, let us prepare to consult a good divorce lawyer. It is no coincidence that the largest number of separations are initiated by Italian spouses, but not only, just after returning from the vacations.
